Oh my god, today was such a terrible day!
When I was writing yesterday's post, I was full of gratitude and happiness. It felt like my life has gotten one notch better through this trip... until today.
So I went to bed around 1:45 last night due to jet lag and a cup of ice coffee I spontaneously had at 9 pm. I ended up taking a melatonin pill to fall asleep, accompanied by reading my kindle. Then today, the commute wasn't so bad and working was fine. But everybody was gone, so I ate lunch by myself while reading Kindle again which wasn't bad at all.
Come 5 pm, I didn't have much to do and the weather outside was really bad. I started feeling really shitty and I didn't know why. I thought I was really tired.
Yesterday, when Andy told me he feels like he's going through depression and emptiness after I left, I didn't understand what he meant. Apparently, we are not couples... so I was like calm down bruh... but today, I was able to feel 100% what he told me yesterday. I think this is what happened.
This graph is the perfect description of what happened.
- Thursday: Start of mini vacation. Watched 2 movies back to back. Felt pretty good.
- Friday: Kings Dominion. Had so much fun.
- Saturday: Off to Madison. Despite 6 hours of flight, finally saw my friends and was back in town after a year and half. Partied. Was really really happy.
- Sunday: Met again with some church friends. Went to casino. blew away $120. But andy made $500 from $60. Recouped all the loss. Drops the chip.
- Monday: My ex did not reply to all my email, texts, calls. Felt pretty bad. My ego plummeted... But anyways, last night in Madison. Felt pretty sentimental
- Tuesday: Met my parents after 8 days. They came back from Alaska trip. Felt pretty happy. Life is good.
- Wednesday: Went to work. Had lunch by myself. Weather was pretty bad. Why am I here, in stead of hanging out with my friends at the lake. I feel like a monkey that's trapped in this shinny office building...
As I write this now, it's 9:17 pm. I met up with my friends and had dinner together. So I'm feeling slightly better now. Then I'm going to hit the gym. Hopefully I can come back to my "normal" state soon..!